3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.