I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
