Is it normal to miss your booty call?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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