when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
She needs sedatives and a leash
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
