i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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