What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
