i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize