im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Randomize
