don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize