I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
