Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
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