I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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