Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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