i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
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I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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