He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize