you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize