i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize