I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
