I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
