Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
