Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Randomize
