I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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