Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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