hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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