I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
