Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
