Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Randomize
