ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
