whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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