SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Boobs speak an international language.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
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