Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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