We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize