four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
