You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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