Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
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