Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
