Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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