Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize