No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I forget how to act sober
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
