I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
His hands were made for my vagina.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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