I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
