There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
