your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
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I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
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Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
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