How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize