So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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