I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
