i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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