Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize