I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
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