so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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