im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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